I had been enslaved but I couldn't believe it was true. My father had sold me to Firul. But why? Did he hate me or were we poor? I didn't knew we were poor.It was a long walk of shame for me, through the streets of our town. We left the square and suddenly I was not news any more. Someone looked up and saw me but there was nothing unusual in a slave girl being led through the streets like this. Some of the men looked me over and smiled at what they saw and others were not concerned at all. Some women looked with contempt and others with pity.It felt slightly easier being unknown and not noticed but I was still crying, I was still in turmoil. At one occasion we passed some older women from my village and they looked at me intensely and pointed and I heard them talking. They would surely report this to the village. I felt even more humiliated then.At last we came to the pens. It was a big grey building encircled by a high wall and although I had often seen it and even seen the slave. At first it had just a quiet place to be, but it quickly became something of a turn-on being in the woods themselves. Looking back I may have equated those woods with getting off, and the excitement of going there just got implanted in my mind. Who knows? But I found the less I wore, the more turned-on I got. On days I would go there, I would get to the end of the road where the trail was and begin my journey in. Others went there, but it was rare to see anyone else out in the woods so I usually felt pretty comfortable doing what I wanted. Just entering the trail I would begin to undo my pants as I walked. Just a few feet in I’d take them off, usually throwing them over my shoulder. I always wore pants as a teen. I was extremely thin during that time, so to hide how scrawny I was. I wore pants and a jacket almost everywhere. The jacket would be the next to come off, so I would be walking in a t-shirt, underwear, and my sneakers. Depending on my mood I’d find a place to sit and play..
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